I have a fake front tooth.
A fake front tooth that makes me crazy.
Especially since I should not have it.
Come take a walk with me down memory lane.
I am twenty one.
I have the most amazing dental coverage under my parents' insurance.
I am at the dentist.
A very busy and popular dentist.
He mentions to me that one one of my front teeth is a fraction longer than the other one.
He asks if I would like them to be the same.
I think
HECK YES!
I did not rock braces at junior prom to have janky teeth!
thankyouverymuch.
So I scheduled an appointment to get it fixed.
Pretend that you are a dentist.
A busy and popular dentist.
What would you do to fix my teeth?
Because if I was a dentist this is what I would do:
shave the longer tooth down a millimeter so it matches the shorter tooth.
Apparently I did not go to dental school.
Wondering if Mr. Popular and Busy did.
Because this is what he did:
Shaved my shorter tooth into a vampire point.
Yes, you read that correctly.
Why didn't I say anything?
I did.
He assured me that this was the way to go.
He is a busy and popular dentist.
I am some dumb English major college student.
Then he capped it.
To make it longer.
Like the other tooth.
I am not kidding.
So I went from a perfectly good, yet marginally shorter tooth to a fake tooth.
On top of a vampire tooth.
We all know how I feel about vampires.
Really.
Then the cap chipped.
I got it fixed.
It chipped again.
Then again.
(Did I mention that I am a gnarly teeth grinder? IF by some miracle I am actually sleeping, chances are gnashing of teeth is involved.)
So finally after 3 new caps in two years,
on what was a great tooth,
I got a veneer.
IN THE WRONG COLOR.
Then my insurance ran out.
The end.
Wah wah.
In real life it doesn't look so bad.
For some reason it just looks crazy in pictures.
Pictures that I always pull into Picnik.
There I fake up my fake tooth with their amazing whitening tool.
I heart you Picnik.
I do not heart you busy and popular dentist.
Posted in faq