Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Confession.

I am super awesome at laundry.
As in super awesome at washing and drying it.
As in super awesome at washing, drying, dumping, and ignoring it.

This summer I have folded and put away the kids laundry a grand total of ZERO times.

Think I am lying?  Being dramatic?  Exaggerating?

Nope.  Total honest truth.

Want to know how I know?  Because the pile, the gigantic pile, the mountain of clothing on the guest room bed, totally contains school uniforms.  School uniforms of which my children only wear to school. Obviously.

But wait, haven't we had guests this summer?  Yes.  Multiple times.
What did I do?
Scooped up that mountain and threw it on Shane's floor.
Then when the guests leave?   I scoop it back up and return it to the bed.

How do my kids get dressed each morning?

They dig through the mountain.
Or they wear bathing suits all day.
Or in Shane's case, just a diaper.

Hey, it's hot and the electric bill is OUT OF CONTROL.

Laundry is my nemesis.  There are thirty zillion billion things I would rather be doing.  This summer I have done all of them, in lieu of laundry.
Folding clothes...
Lame.
Baking cupcakes, swimming, hosting parties, making printables, going to the beach, pretty much any other thing in the universe....
Way less lame than laundry.

So if you are feeling bad that you can't get everything done.  Or that everyone else in the world can, think of me.  Think of the number ZERO.
Think of my three year old digging through laundry for a pair of socks.
Or my forlorn son, rocking a diaper.  All day long.  Or skeleton sweatpants.  Because that is all I could find last night.

Know that you aren't alone.  Know that it's okay. Know that there is someone who has it way LESS TOGETHER than you do.  She also has a baby who is addicted to her.  She might also laugh at his drama.  Because honestly? He is pathetic and hilarious.  If he is not either A.  Attached to me B.  Being fed gobs of food or C.  Destroying things, he is crying.  That's how he rolls.  He apparently did not get the memo that the fourth kid is supposed to CHILL OUT.

Zero times.  All summer.  Zero.

53 comments:

  1. while reading this i keep hearing usher's song "confessions"....lol
    and thinking about shane dogs sweet face....
    laundry...
    lame.

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  2. confession. i would so do the same thing.
    i think about people in other countries. they wear their clothes over and over and over and over.

    your kids can wear things 2, 5, 34 times before washing.
    i say yes.

    let's start a laundry free revolution.

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  3. and dude.
    skeleton sweatpants?

    shane and i are kindred.

    skullz for dayzzzz.

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  4. love this! makes me feel not alone for not having it all together! hugs to you!

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  5. Rock on. there are currently two monster piles by the laundry room door. Hey, at least they are separated into girls and boys.

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  6. OH, and if I feed you cupcakes, would you teach me how to make printables?

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  7. I also did this, now it's just me not so much now. When I was young my mum would wash and do the same thing, but my dad needed clean shirts, so you may ask who ironed and folded or hung them, me and my sister, hence why I hate laundry now.

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  8. Sigh... those dirty little secrets we keep! :) I can relate. I hate laundry. I usually get pretty close - it'll get mostly folded - then left in the basket until I need the basket. lol. Sometimes it gets sorted by family member... but not always. :)

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  9. I love this!! Is there ANYONE that likes to fold and put away??! I think not. There should be a machine that does it all... I too rock at washing and drying. And dumping. I currently have 8 loads sitting on my bedroom floor just begging to abbey folded. Meh.

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  10. Exactly! I confess too...our laundry room is upstairs, and clean basket after clean basket is left in the hallway, until we begin loading clean clothes on top of the seven laundry baskets we have. We call it the Mountain (we have a radio station here called that). The Mountain drives my husband a little batty, so at some point, I end up folding all of it - it takes 2-3 hours, while he keeps kids entertained, and then we begin the process all again. My kids prefer jammies by the way - all summer long, all mismatched. He says, it's summer, why is this happening? That's exactly it! It's summer, and we're enjoying it!

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  11. Love the confession.
    Totally serious, we make our boys put away their own laundry. It has helped a TON to cut back on what laundry needs to be put away. I don't even care that they don't match up their pj tops and bottoms or that they don't fold their socks together. We started "laundry party" when they were 4 and by 6, they were doing it on their own.

    I also make them vacuum the kitchen since they make the biggest mess, pick up the house, empty the dishwasher, set the table, etc.

    Harnessing the power of child labor is awesome.

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  12. I have the monster pile lurking in my bedroom. It's separated into hers and his and HIS is getting frustrated that it isn't put away. That's when the ugly laundry monster pipes in with "you can put it away, too" Classy, I know. But it's the bane of my existence. That and the dishes I just cleaned being caked on with melted drippy cheese sauce.

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  13. Halleluiah sister for keeping it real. What's most important right??? making memories with your children or putting away laundry??!! I have heard of a door sign that says "Please pardon our mess, my family is making memories". Nuff said. Thanks for the post!

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  14. winning! I play the bed to laundry basket game, as if dumping it all over MY bed will inspire me to fold it and put it away to get it off my bed....nope. never happens, It goes back and forth about 4 weeks until its practically empty from taking things out of the massive pile. Then we start all over again! Nudists are smart....no laundry.

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  15. I too am horrible at getting laundry put away, we have small piles everywhere. Lots of clean clothes not put away, that's my forte. Well... sometimes it's not... sometimes it gets left in the washing machine (yuck!) or the dryer for a couple of days. whoops.

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  16. Ha! I love everything about that post.

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  17. this is absolutely, BY FAR, my most favorite post ever of the summer. EVER.

    skeleton pants. hahaha!

    it is very evident by the complete crinkles in all of the boys polo shirt collars that i have this very problem.

    or that my husband has worn the same socks for days(bad girl!).

    or the fact that i have re-dryed certain loads up to THREE times, and possibly rewashed a few, too.

    i used to be so good! :)
    xoxo


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  18. So. Very. Real. (and I have seen loving, fun posts all summer, even without folding clothes, there has been happiness. Imagine.)
    At my house, my husband's clothes get folded, because he likes it that way. All my undies, stuffed in the drawer, move on!
    :-}pokey

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  19. Ha! That is awesome! I am going to show this to my husband so he knows that I am not the only one. Unfortunately we don't have a guest room so it is either on our tiny loveseat or in a basket in the laundry room. Oh, well.

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  20. You crack me up.
    I have a perpetual pile of laundry on my couch waiting to be folded and put away.
    I used to be mostly caught up on laundry.
    But when I had #4, it pushed me over the edge into laundry hell.
    I'm glad to know I am not alone.
    Love from,
    Greta

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  21. Ha! Laundry has always been my nemesis. That is until I realized my 11 and 16 year old could actually take some control over that area of their lives and wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry all by themselves! I just have to be the mean, old dictator telling them to do it and after all the grief they have given me over the years, I don't feel too bad about it at all.

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  22. I love this. Brutal honesty. I only fold my own stuff, the rest of the house can fend for themselves :)

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  23. Thank you for keeping it real! :)

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  24. Haha, I LOVED this! And it's pretty funny thinking about your kids digging around for clothes! :) I hate folding and putting away laundry too...I have one bin for all of my boys pj's, and one for their underwear and they just have to find their's, unfolded of course.

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  25. Before I was married I thought nothing of sleeping on one side of the bed with a pile of clean laundry on the other side. My husband is one who unpacks his suitcase within 10 minutes of returning from a trip. I pretend not to notice while he folds the laundry I left on the bed.

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  26. when we built our closet in the old house i asked craig if we could just go with a hook system.....no folding no hangers. just hooks and big drawers/baskets. he laughed at me. i wasn't kidding. i hate as much as you do. you should see my laundry room julie....it's like an earthquake went through. for reals.
    thanks for being who you are.

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  27. pure awesomeness!!! THANK YOU for the honesty!! im right there with you with being so NOT with it :). its a myth that youre supposed to have it all together!!!!!!!

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  28. Me too! :) And if I ever do fold laundry? I never do the socks. We dig through 2 baskets each morning to find 4 pairs of (mostly) matching socks. It's awesome.

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  29. Thank you! Honestly, thanks so much for making me feel a little better about my laundry slacking ways. Although you at least have the excuse that you are taking care of 4 kids. It's just the hubby and I, but still. I sort it, wash it, dry it, and then...nothing.
    The rest of our house is clean and tidy, but I panic thinking of someone walking into our laundry room.
    I swear I say over and over again, "Tomorrow night, I'll fold". Then tomorrow comes and nothing gets folded. I am out of the house at 6:15am and get home around 6:00pm. After dinner gets made, I want to squeeze in sewing, or pinteresting, or baking, or watching tv without folding laundry at the same time.
    Thanks for keeping it real, and making feeling like a little less of a lazy slacker! :)

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  30. That is awesome!! My laundry has only gotten past the mountain stage because my sister-in-law has been living with us and she likes to do it for some crazy unknown reason to me!! Otherwise, I am in the same boat as you. Glad I'm not the only one!

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  31. You know pack and plays make super awesome ginormous laundry baskets! (without kids in them!)

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  32. yep, that's me! thanks for letting us know we're not the only ones!

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  33. I am cracking up... I transitioned from part time to full time on July 2nd....since then, NO clothes have been put away... My kids are living out of laundry baskets. You and Jeanette over at liferearranged.com have made my whole week! I am so glad I'm not alone!!!!

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  34. You give me hope in my own inadequacies. I {{heart}} you, friend!

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  35. I love this post! Thanks for being so honest and hilarious at the same time. :)

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  36. So, so great! Thanks for keepin it real girl! Love your blog & your IG.
    Thanks for opening a little window into your world! :)

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  37. So, so great! Thanks for keepin it real girl! Love your blog & your IG.
    Thanks for opening a little window into your world! :)

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  38. I am not alone!! thank you! haha :)

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  39. I read this post in the throes of a "whoa is me as a mother" moment. Thanks for keeping it real and helping me remember not to sweat the little stuff!

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  40. pick that poor baby up! awwww
    i'll hold you shane.
    bless his heart.
    pitiful

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  41. Hi there! I love this post! Currently I have a pile on folded laundry on my dryer . . . I don't mind doing laundry, I just hate having to put it all away! lol Thank you for keeping it real for everyone in the blogging world! :)
    AFG,
    Megan Jenelle @ A Blossoming Homestead
    http://ablossominghomestead.blogspot.com

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  42. This post is beyond awesome! I have so been there. In fact, we encourage mis-matching socks around here because the best my kids get for socks is a basket to choose from. It takes way too much time to try to match them up. Thank you for being brave enough to confess this. It really does make me feel a little less alone in my mommy cheats.

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  43. Yeah..me too. I posted a pic of my clean laundry pile on instagram to no response...crickets. I felt sheepish :S

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  44. I JUST finished blogging about my lack of planning meals this entire summer. Thank you for sharing this. I am feeling much less inadequate as a mother right now. Glad to know I am not alone. We cannot be supper-mom all the time.

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  45. I know this was all about "confessions", but I have a suggestion about the actual laundry :)! Put five SMALL laundry baskets in front of your washer/dryer area. When an item comes out of the dryer, drop it in the owner's basket. You might never get to the step where you put the laundry away in each person's room, but it keeps the laundry sorted by person. This way you can rummage around in Shane's basket for skeleton sweatpants instead of a gigantic FAMILY SIZE pile.

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  46. Whew! So awesome. I feel better. Thanks!

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  47. Hey! Long-time reader/lurker here...I was struggling tonight with various things and thought about your blog and knew that I would find something inspirational. So, I read this "zero" post and yes, it made me smile but most of all you spoke to me in that last paragraph, "you are not alone...it's okay." funny how God points us in a direction sometimes. So thanks and keep up the good work, which does not invovle folding laundry.

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  48. I just love you : ) Rock it, lady!

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  49. you just made me feel a 100x's better. Since my husband has deployed & I'm feeling lonely in Japan... I've felt like doing anything else... but NOT doing laudry & a massive pile lays on our kitchen table... My reasoning for the pile still on the kitchen table? My 11 month old son eats in his high chair and I can eat on the couch...

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