Wednesday, February 22, 2012

How I almost got murdered on Valentine's Day.

A.  This RAD BANNER has nothing to do with the following story.  I just happen to love it.  But then again a YAY is in order when I think about the fact that I in fact did not indeed get murdered.
B.  Y is my favorite letter in the alphabet.  What is yours?
C.  Again, I just really love this banner.  A lot a lot a lot.
D.  I gave up sugar.  Again.  This time for Lent.  Yesterday I wanted to go have one crazy giant Cadbury egg fueled last hurrah.  But the swagger wagon was at the dealer because the clicker thing that opens the sliding doors was broken.  Sigh.  More of the rich people problems.
E.  On with the murder story.

So, I am not a huge Valentine's Day girl.  I don't hate it, per se.  I just don't looooooove it, you know.  I don't like roses.  Boxes of weird nut and nougat filled chocolate are super creepy to me (unless it is a box of milk chocolate Bordeaux from See's, because that is something I could support).  Going out to eat in the midst of big crowds?  No.  Plus there is that whole childcare thing.
(The kind of flowers I most love to get.)

Of all the holidays, Valentine's Day is one of them.

But, I didn't want to ignore the deal all together.  So Jason's parents kindly agreed to watch the girls for a few hours and we planned Shane's nap to give us just enough time to eat a quiet meal. One that didn't involve any family members CRYING because they suddenly hate food, or cheese, or butter, or chicken nuggets, or normal things that were TOTALLY FINE the day before.  Drama, I tell you, drama.

On the way back from dropping them off, he picked up our meals from a place that we have been going to forever and ever.  A place that we love.  A place that apparently, recently totally stripped down their menu, and ditched all of OUR MOST FAVORITE things.  Not just removed them from the menu, but you could still order them, and the kitchen will oblige your old school request, sort of ditching.  NO.  Never again to be seen.  Gone.  Forever and ever.  Our favorite dessert in all the world?  Buh bye.  The nerve.
But we tried to be flexible, perhaps sulked a bit, thought about changing restaurants, but tarried on.  With different, less favorite items.

We ate.
Blah blah blah.
Shane woke up.
Picked up the girls.
They went to bed.
I started feeling crummy.
Shane went to bed.
I fell asleep.
Somehow Shane slept through his normal 1am party time.  YAY!  (Tie in with the banner... eh?  I'm not totally random.)
Then at 3:12 I woke up.
The kind of wake up you never, ever, ever, want.
The dizzy, angry stomach, kind of wake up.
Ya.  You know the kind.

I will spare you the details, but for the record, I have an incredibly high tolerance for throwing up.  I have survived hyperemesis gravidarum three times, and lived to tell about it.  Sort of.

This was a whole different level.  Ten thousand different levels, in fact.

I am positive that I saw the Grim Reaper himself, lounging in the bathtub, patiently biding his time, playing Sudoku, while I lay SOBBING on the bathroom floor.
It was that bad.  If we didn't have a houseful of kids, I would have made Jason take me to the ER.  But then again, going to the ER meant I would have had to move from the bathroom floor.  Which was a wholly, totally,  impossible task, given the whole Grim Reaper-ness and such.

The restaurant, which shall not be named, tried to straight up MURDER me.  On Valentine's day.
It is now dead to me.  Forever and ever and ever.  First they took away caramel apple cream cheese pie, which in itself is almost unforgivable.  But then they tried to make my husband a widower.  Not cool, not cool at all.

The plus side to this saga?  I got my nineteen hours of rest.  Not exactly the way that I would have hoped.  But Lucy asked God, and He answered.
(Of course self portrait day for the February photo challenge had to happen on this day.  Of course.)

Nineteen hours snuggled under Halley's rainbow unicorn down comforter.
Yay?????
With this little face to keep me company.
Yay.

30 comments:

  1. the grim reaper visited me once too! i'm pretty sure he was playing majhong! it was awful... my husband had it the exact same time. guess who had to put the kids on the bus. as the bus pulls up i run to throw up one last time before i stumble out and hand off my little!
    you should definitely boycott that awful awful place!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I wanna guess Claim Jumper. Only because they got rid of all my family's favorites too! Jerks. One of those being the chocolate cream cheese pie...the last part of its name and your dessert's name made me think CJ.
    Glad you're not murdered. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Isn't always, the nights our babies actually sleep that we don't?!? Seriously annoying. Best line ever about the Grimm reaper in the bathtub.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh my heck, those STUNNING eyes. You are in so much trouble when that kid reaches high school. Sorry about the sickness, and the restaurant changes. :(

    ReplyDelete
  5. Isn't it funny how God let's us have what we want?
    Okay, not so funny, but I see the irony in my own life and can laugh...four weeks later. After I said, "Doesn't God know I need a bit of a break?" just 24 hours later I am in the hospital for 24 hours doing nothing because the right side of my face fell asleep. Niiiiiice.

    I love the YAY! banner.
    And I love that Heather girl.
    Yay for Cookie Mondays!

    ReplyDelete
  6. you made me laugh out loud about the grim reaper... so sorry, stomach stuff is the worst.

    ReplyDelete
  7. YIKES. You deserve a YAY banner times 2575. Puking = worst fear/rather give birth/haven't done it it 15+ years/knock on wood. I am so, so sorry! Bleh.

    PS THANK YOU!

    ReplyDelete
  8. So sorry you were sick---I know that pain. Last April, I did end up in the ER for a similar incident and then spent the next 24 hours there!
    But those GORGEOUS blue eyes you got to stare into as you were sick---definitely a plus!

    ReplyDelete
  9. No fun. That is how I am feeling right now. It makes you kind of want to die. If I did not have 3 little boys trying to keep me alive I think I would just want to curl up and disappear. I do not think I am as sick as you were, but I pretty much do not want to after feeling like this all day.

    On a happier note...I saw you and your cute family at Disneyland on Friday. I was in line for Mr. Toads Wild Ride when I looked up and thought "That looks like Julie from Joys Hope." My sister later told me I was a little weird for knowing that. It made me happy seeing your cute family in their own element with 3 darling daughters all in different princes costumes. You have a darling family.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I have been there a few times myself and it is no fun. Sorry! Glad you lived to see those beautiful eyes again.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm sorry but I was reading this all stealth like during bible study and I'm totally busted when I read the bathtub grim reaper line.. Spit my coffee everywhere ! Thanks:) jm glad your better!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Soooo sorry! Glad you got your 19 hrs of sleep and didn't die! I didn't even know there was a morning sickness worse than the 'normal' version. Bless your heart!

    ReplyDelete
  13. My favorite letter is J. Hard to show you why here, but when I write it in cursive I add a loop to the top and I think it looks pretty.
    Also, we have the child food drama here, too. My "butter is the new ketchup" 3 year old decided mid-bite one night that she did not like butter anymore. Without thinking I answered, "Then don't swallow the butter, just swallow the peas." My husband almost spit out his food trying not to laugh. But the little miss said, "Oh. Okay." And all was good again. I still don't know what happened to the butter that went into her mouth but didn't get swallowed :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. I got a bug and spent my Valentine's Day between the bed and the bathroom floor, too! Boo!

    ReplyDelete
  15. You are hilarious even when you're sick! I do hope you are feeling so much better. If you aren't by now, you have a serious problem. I'm just glad you lived to tell us all about it!

    ReplyDelete
  16. First of all, I love the title right above the YAY banner. I knew the story would be great right away. Second, God does answer prayers! That just makes me laugh in an "I'm glad you got some rest but sorry you felt like you wanted to die" kind of way!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh no.... any benefit of losing a few lbs? To me, that's the only one.

    And I thought I was the only one who didn't like roses. I love roses just out of the garden but really don't like florist ones at all. Give me some daisies or daffodils any day.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Awwwww how sad! I hate getting barfy/murderously sick (and it DOES happen with food poisoning!) It's been awhile, but I can easily recall that horrible, "Seriously, I'm so dizzy and puking right here on the floor is pretty comfortable right now, so don't touch me" feeling. I'm up for 19 hours of sleep though. Holy cow! :) And ps - I love that banner too.

    Kristina
    Nook & Sea

    ReplyDelete
  19. I really like your sense of humor! Sorry you got so sick. No bueno!

    ReplyDelete
  20. You made me laugh tears. So sorry you nearly got murdered. Hope you are feeling better now.
    Niki

    ReplyDelete
  21. That little man is CUTE! In France they call your sickness the "gastro" that way they never have to whisper the very "unchic" words vomit or diarrhea:)

    ReplyDelete
  22. That little man is CUTE! In France they call your sickness the "gastro" that way they never have to whisper the very "unchic" words vomit or diarrhea:)

    ReplyDelete
  23. so many things.....

    1. all sugar? wow you are hard core. i am giving up dessert for lent and i might die. last night at community group there was chocolate mocha torte cake....not cool. i had to get THIRDS of hash brown casserole to ease my pain. i think i canceled out the giving up dessert with that one. oh well. learning to say no to myself...never easy.

    2. food poisoning is the worst worst worst. so sorry. i got food poisoning on mother's day one year. and i thought i was dying...totally relate to your grim reaper. i remember saying out loud, "i'm dyyyyying" on more than one occasion that day. yech.

    3. hope you have a happy sunny weekend. with lots of sleep and no throwing up.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh boy. I've had food poisoning once, and is was HORRIBLE. So very, very horrible, I never want to do that again. I'm glad that you made it to the other side ;-)

    P.S. I'm entertaining a big ole sugar withdrawl headache right now. oy. 40 days, eh?

    ReplyDelete
  25. Yikes Julie! You and I need to swap stories about
    1) never ever never going out ON Valentines Day (I could write a thesis on this)
    2) Really thinking I did die after blacking out from the same very wrong illness... all on new year's eve. Kind of summed up moments of 2011 actually! ;)
    Way to turn a really horrible scene into comedy to share later. YAY that you are all better. And may the cadburys leave you smiling til Easter, friend.

    ReplyDelete
  26. those eyes on shane are unreal!!!
    gorgeous in every way.

    i am glad you did not get murdered.
    so so glad.
    :)

    a bra post eh??
    i accept your challenge.
    HA!

    ReplyDelete
  27. you make almost dying sound like fun... though i'm certain it was not.
    i had extreme hyperemesis gravidarum when i was prego too. i consider myself to be a master vomiter. however i do not want the grimm reaper to visit me to test my vomiting abilities.
    i should have know you were very sick when you were prego because you have INCREDIBLY gorgeous children. so do i. :-) i have a theory that the sicker you are the cuter the kids. when moms tell me they weren't sick at all i think 'oh poor lady. her kids are ugly.'
    it's mean. but it makes me feel better, "yay!"

    ReplyDelete
  28. i am so sorry you were so sick :( Not fun at all!

    and oh. my. goodness. you just helped me put a name to my horrible pregnancies! i don't know why my obgyn never brought it up. i am offically self-diagnosing myself ;) with my first, i threw up all day, everyday. i would wake out of a sound sleep at 3am and throw up something i had eaten at lunchtime. and i continued to throw up EVERYDAY for 15 months AFTER I had her! I had to go and get an endoscopy because my doctor thought that was rather odd. Really?

    same thing with my second. I had to go to the ER and get IV fluids because i could not stay hydrated. and for my scheduled c-section, i was throwing up for the first 10 minutes and they were kind enough to unstrap my head so i could lean to the side and throw up in a bucket my husband was holding for me. and the nurse asked me to try to stay more calm and still because my belly convulsing in spasms while the doctor was cutting me open. wow. never want to live through that again! atleast i stopped throwing up when i had the second one and didn't keep puking for more than a year after.

    i definitely feel your pain! and i am so glad to hear that you are feeling better...your little ones are precious. And I love that Lucy prayed for you. so sweet :)

    ReplyDelete
  29. i am so sorry you were so sick :( Not fun at all!

    and oh. my. goodness. you just helped me put a name to my horrible pregnancies! i don't know why my obgyn never brought it up. i am offically self-diagnosing myself ;) with my first, i threw up all day, everyday. i would wake out of a sound sleep at 3am and throw up something i had eaten at lunchtime. and i continued to throw up EVERYDAY for 15 months AFTER I had her! I had to go and get an endoscopy because my doctor thought that was rather odd. Really?

    same thing with my second. I had to go to the ER and get IV fluids because i could not stay hydrated. and for my scheduled c-section, i was throwing up for the first 10 minutes and they were kind enough to unstrap my head so i could lean to the side and throw up in a bucket my husband was holding for me. and the nurse asked me to try to stay more calm and still because my belly convulsing in spasms while the doctor was cutting me open. wow. never want to live through that again! atleast i stopped throwing up when i had the second one and didn't keep puking for more than a year after.

    i definitely feel your pain! and i am so glad to hear that you are feeling better...your little ones are precious. And I love that Lucy prayed for you. so sweet :)

    ReplyDelete
  30. My favorite letter is L. Cursive, obvs. And I get your secret code. Your blah blah blah is the reinvented seinfeld "yada yada" of the nineties. Nice. But sorry you were almost murdered. I'm glad you weren't.

    ReplyDelete

I love sunshine, happy people, and the power to delete. Sparkles! Rainbows! Unicorns!